A dark cloud hung over me this week thus, the lack of blogging. I felt powerless while my emotions went on a rollercoaster ride. I stuck to my workout regime, healthy eats, and busy study schedule, but at night I'd unravel and break down in tears. Finally, mid-week, instead of putting on a brave face I decided to honor my emotions, and myself, and release my negativity in a healthy and constructive way.
So yes, as March came to a close, I lost my balance and opened the door to what I can only deem as stress, anxiety, and dispair...or perhaps they snuck through the cracks when I wasn't looking. Sneaky little devils.
But it's okay. I acknowledged my sadness and rolled with the emotions. I let my tears fall and listened to my heart beat.
Come Friday afternoon, after an hour of morning class, I went for a long walk and wound up at South Melbourne Market, my favourite neighbourhood market. It was warm with a light breeze, the perfect fall day (different than autumn in Toronto, that's for sure). At the market I almost bought a $3 goldfish, but then realized the fish bowl, food, etc was a little pricy..but who knows, maybe I'll go back for goldy. I couldn't help but laugh at myself. Instead I left with avocados, cheap and oh-so-ripe bananas, bright red peppers, and a two dollar koala magnet ;)
When you look closely, light is always poking through. The universe is at your side, providing guidance and answers when you feel lost or broken. If you remember to breathe deeply, you'll find the answers. With every breath, you'll slowly but surely know what to do - whether you go for a walk, take a nap, write it down, or make that decision - for your intuition will guide you in the right direction.
By the time I got home, I felt much more calm and collected. After a quick workout and some email catch-up, I stumbled across a recent blog post by Joy called "Spring Clean Your Mind with an Emotional Detox". Thanks, Joy..great post. Thank you universe. April is a new month, a new slate (and Alex and I are flying to Thailand for 10 days over Easter break!) I can't wait to see what April brings. *Open heart, open mind*
Farewell my black balloon. Hello April.