A breakthrough

"Dear Gemini, push yourself a little bit harder today, because one final effort could be all it takes to make the breakthrough you have been hoping for. Today’s sun-Pluto link will simply destroy whatever obstacle is in your path."

For those of you who know me well, I am fascinated by astrology and read my horoscope daily. My Dad says it "hogs wash", whatever that means. But I say it's a study, a type of literature, which must be read beyond the Arts & Life section of your daily newspaper. Astrology is neither false nor "hogs wash" (seriously Dad?), but it certainly may not interest everyone...clearly that includes my Father.

Today my horoscope instantly struck a chord because I really do feel on the verge of a breakthrough. A breakthrough so big, so life changing, that my heart might explode. A lot has changed and evolved in the past month; from understanding the importance of healing to a shift in my career goals, my life has been buzzing with excitement, deep-thoughts, and anticipation. But really, what am I waiting for?

Break-through: An act of overcoming or penetrating an obstacle or restriction.

As each and every day snowballs with more excitement my heart pumps thicker blood and my lungs fill heavier with breath. In the midst of it all I have to pause, breathe, and remind myself of where I am, precisely at this moment in time.

It's ironic because when I think about it there is no real anticipation of what's to come. All the answers are within me...I just have to let go and release it.

[photo cred: Robot Heart]

"Whatever relationships you have attracted in your life at this moment, are precisely the ones you need in your life at this moment. There is a hidden meaning behind all events, and this hidden meaning is serving your own evolution." - Deepak Chopra

New York, New York

I went to NYC this weekend, from Friday to Sunday, to visit my best friend Nadine. As I had hoped, it was the perfect weekend getaway. We walked until our feet ached, peeled fresh oranges in Central Park, and laughed until our abs hurt (on numerous occasions). It was exactly what we needed, a weekend of light, laughter, and love.

[Walking in Central Park]

Thankfully my awful reaction was 90% healed and I was able to enjoy myself, without feeling self conscious or uncomfortable. Despite all positive signs of healing, I still protected myself with a hat, spf, and sunglasses. I also monitored my water intake like crazy and ensured to eat lots of cooling fruits and veggies. Melon, cucumber, and more melon! 

I stayed at the Millennium Hilton for two nights, and Nadine joined me for some slumber party fun of course! We stayed up late chatting and slept like babies, thanks to a sound machine (set on "ocean") provided by the hotel. I need to invest in a sound machine asap, especially for when the boyfriend and I move in together. 

[Shade, away from the downtown city smog]

It was really hot and humid in NYC so we tried to walk in the shade as much as possible. We walked everywhere, through central park, Union Square, China town, and SoHo. We also made a pit-stop at the W Hotel to pee, fill up our water bottles, and help ourselves to a green apple. It was sheer brilliance, don't you agree?

I stayed at the W last time I was in New York, so I figured it was okay ;)

[Whole Foods dinner & breakfast snacks for two]

We went to Whole Foods a lot and naturally gravitated toward the salad bar (vegan options) and fresh fruits. I also picked up a bunch of Lara Bar flavours - Cookie Dough and Ginger Snap !! - that are not in Canada yet. We both eat extremely healthy and have very clean diets, so it was easy deciding on what we wanted for meals and snacks.

Instead of eating out on Saturday night we went to Whole Foods (again, hehe) and had a fun night in. We were beat from walking all day Friday and Saturday, so it felt good to skip the club scene and just relax. We both curled up in our PJS, scarfed down our salads, and took funny photos with our blackberries. It was like Grade 11 all over again, only better.

I don't know what I'd do without Nadine. She is my constant and sturdy rock, full of positive energy and hopeful reminders that I am, without a doubt, exactly where I should be in life. We've ben separated by cities, miles, and oceans, yet our friendship still evolves to stronger and even more beautiful heights.

I'm counting my blessings, and my best friend is certainly one of them.

[@ club Strange Love, 2009 or maybe 2008?...time flies <3]

If you're gonna get up, you might as well get up with me
If you're going downtown, I might as well be on your way
And I sit all night, I sit still all night
I won't tell one soul, I won't tell one soul
I just can't get it straight you see and oh well
That distraction inside of me, oh well
I just can't get it straight you see and oh well
Is fine by you, I am fine by you
I won't tell one soul, I won't tell one soul
If you're going downtown, take me with you
I don't care if I'm gonna get up, I'll just admit it
I only get up for you if I'm going to get up
I'll just admit it I only get up for you
And I sit all night, I sit still all night
I won't tell one soul, I won't tell one soul

- Downtown, Tegan & Sara

How to heal

To heal is to become whole and sound; a return to health. While the outcome is clear (health versus illness) the definition still lingers with ambiguity. If "healing" is an action, then the definition fails to define the actual process of how to heal. I haven't blogged in a while because a week ago I woke up with a horrible, and rather emotional, allergic reaction. Bits and pieces of this blog post have been sitting in my draft folder for days, because I couldn't bring myself to write without my emotions swallowing me whole.

My rash sparked from a heated imbalance of ayurvedic herbs and suppressed stress, which exploded into a full blown posion-ivy like rash. Like dominos fall, my physical reaction led to overflowing emotions, painful anxiety, and what felt like endless tears. After many deep breaths I pulled myself together and sought help from my group of natural experts -  my naturopath, an ayurvedic practitioner, a holistic skin expert, and my best friend - to whom I am forever grateful.

After soaking-up all the knowledge around me, I was able to conclude that my reaction (redness, itchy-ness, and all) was actually a blessing. While there was nothing internally or topically wrong, my body had purged an incredible amount of stress, unaddressed emotions, and lingering toxins from eliminating the birth control pill and my last cleanse. The ayurvedic herbs simply brought it all to the surface, in an undesirable way.

To combat my reaction I loaded-up on cooling foods such as cucumbers, melon, and coconut water. I doubled my flax seed oil intake and incorporated more turmeric (a natural inflammatory) into my regime. After six days of healing lotion, energy work from an ayurvedic doctor, and much mediation (which is normally a challenge for me), my rash began to fade and heal...just in time for my trip to New York, to visit Nadine. 

Throughout my recovery it was a struggle to sit with myself and remain present. It wasn't easy to seek inward and understand what was there, as opposed to starring hopelessly at the surface. I had to look deeper, beyond the tears and discomfort, to truly reflect on myself.

Despite it's external horror, I see now that it was a true blessing. Already, ten days out, I feel stronger and more evolved. With many big decisions on my horizon, my healing process taught me the beauty and power of balance. I know that my energy, ambition, and daily routine needs more of it, especially during a time of transition.

With my running gear on, rash free, I can confidently say that I've realigned and rebalanced. If I could define how to heal, it would be to remain still and be present with yourself.

Mountain pose teaches us, literally, how to stand on our own two feet.... teaching us to root ourselves into the earth.... Our bodies become a connection between heaven and earth.

My book of hearts

I find comfort and calmness in scrapbooking. I enjoy cutting my photographs into pretty shapes, arranging restaurant receipts, and colouring in the details. I'll admit, sometimes it's hard to find the time for arts and crafts, let alone to get photos developed. But somehow, in the midst of my busy schedule, I find the time to capture my adventures into a book of hearts. Believe me, I never thought I'd be doing "arts and crafts" at 22-years-old, but I love being able to share my books with both my friends and family. And the fact that it relaxes me, makes a couple hours of cutting and pasting totally worth it.

I have three complete scrapbooks, dating from January, 2007. It's my goal to make a scrapbook for every year. My current scrapbook has very big pages, so I was able to capture two years (how efficient of me). I began my latest scrapbook in spring, 2009 and will complete it this month! I have one page left...

Here are a few images from my most recent scrapbook;

[NYC, June, 2009]

[Summer, 2009]

[June, 2010]

[Graduation, 2009, and on the edge of summer]

[19 pages later...I have 1 page left]

The last page is tricky. I believe the last page should have that "wow" factor, yet wrap-up the book as a whole. It becomes even tricker when you have tons of unused photographs, cards, tickets, and other miscellaneous memories. 

If you're a fan of scrapbooking, or would like to start, here are a few tips - from me, to you - to create your very own book of hearts. 

• Buy a blank photo album or spiral-bound craft book
• I recommend a book with no more than 30 pages.. too many pages can sometimes become overwhelming 
• I also recommend a book with pages that you can write on! I learned my lesson two years ago when I bought a book with black pages! I had to buy special gel-pens and white-out, just so I could write on the pages! lol, silly me. 
• Collect photos, cards, notes, restaurant cards, receipts, movie tickets...the sky's the limit!
• Invest in a pencil case or use an old shoe box
• This is to hold all your "stuff" i.e. glue, scissors, markers, paper, and memories! 
• Get creative!
• It's easiest to begin a scrapbook in chronological order; however, documenting your journey and book of hearts is totally up to you 
• Tip: layer photographs on top of cards and/or colourful background paper
• Tip #2: arts and craft stores have an entire scrapbook section, full of pretty paper, stickers, pens, and stencils.  If you want it to be 100% homemade, use magazine tear-outs instead. 

After my yoga class this evening, I'm going to curl up in bed and break out the arts of crafts! =) Hopefully I won't get any marker or glue on my freshly washed sheets...ah well, if it is the price I pay for a perfect last page, then so be it. 

Party of 4

Today my Dad turned 58-years-old. HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD!!!

To celebrate, Alex and I made a delicious Mexican themed dinner. This past Spring we took a "Mexican" couple's cooking course at the Calphalon studio. The meal we made was incredible, so we decided to whip up a few dishes for my Dad's special dinner. It was a party of four - My Dad, Mum, Alex, and I. My brother is an overnight camp counsellor so he's been away all summer.

On the menu:

• My famous guacamole
• Spicy chicken poblano quesadillas 
• Rice and veggie stuffed peppers
• Birthday cake! (from Pusateri's)
• Organic Mill Street beer and red wine galore!

Let's just say, no one left hungry!

The avocados were perfectly ripe! MmmMmmm creamy goodness.

My famous guac:

• 2-4 ripe avocados, mashed! (depending on how many you're serving)
• I used 2 large and 2 small avocados!
• 1/2 cup of cilantro, chopped (and for garnish)
• 1 red tomato, chopped 
• 1/4 cup of white onion, chopped
• 1 lime, squeeeezed
• 1/2 jalapeno pepper, finely chopped
• salt and pepper to taste

As always, the guacamole was done in no time at all!

Extra spicccccccccy. Alex loves spicy curries, peppers, and hot sauces. He smothers his pizza and pasta in spicy oils or chilli flakes. Me, on the other hand...not so much. I have to watch my hot-n-spicy food intake. Although I sometimes enjoy a little spice - and by sometimes, I mean a few small chilli flakes - I am very sensitive to hot and spicy foods.

[peppers pre-bbq]

ooo yes, stuffed pepper madness.

These were tasty little critters, stuffed with:

• organic brown rice
• jumbo thompson raisins
• walnuts
• jalapenos
• red onions
• hot red peppers (I steered clear of these)
• organic dried mango (these added a lovely sweetness)

Needless to say, it was a feast! 

[amazing chicken poblano quesadillas]

If you'd like this recipe, in detail, please email me and I'd be happy to send it to you. 

[stuffed pepper madness, post-bbq]

These were absolutely heavenly! I love the tinfoil bbq trick, it makes summer cooking that much easier. The less clean-up, the better! We were all mmm-ing and aaah-ing at the dinner table.

[My favourite man in the whole wide world, my Dad]

My Dad's health is also very important to him. He works out regularly and eats well. The only thing I nag him on is to drink more water! ....maybe I should of bought him a Kleen Kanteen for his birthday. Rats. 

[white-choclate wrapped chocolate cake]

Looking good Dad! Fifty-eight going on thirty-eight, wouldn't you agree? ;)

I've been a Daddy's-girl my whole life. He is my wisdom, strength, and laughter when I feel like pouting. I'll never forget when he helped me to move into my house of second year University...just as he was about to leave, I burst into tears. Out of no where, I began to cry as if I was four-years-old again, not wanting him to leave me alone at daycare. Maybe it was the heat from moving heavy furniture into a house with no air conditioning, maybe I was overwhelmed that summer was over and classes were approaching, or maybe I was just so thankful to have him there; with me and by my side, as I was about to embark on a new chapter in my life.

Thank you Dad, you mean the world to me. Happy Birthday.

I hope you all had a wonderful and sun-filled weekend!

Sweet dreams,

Humid X

I woke up this morning as a great ball of fire, literally. The humidity levels in Toronto are out of control and poor little me broke out in hives as a result. Today it was 28 degrees but it "feels like" 37. The humidity levels were at 66 percent. I'm not entirely sure what that means, but it ain't cool that's for sure.

I've only broken out in hives twice in my life. The first time occurred on a really hot day when I was under a lot of stress. The second time, which occurred today, was also heat and stress related. I'm not exactly sure why today was a hive-kinda-day because my room is quite cool..I guess my stress got the best of me. Moral of the story is heat + stress + hives = uncomfortable situation. Once I shot out of bed I immediately spritzed my face and neck with Pure + Simple's chamomile hydrosol. I then put on a cooling cucumber mask, also from Pure + Simple. Ahh cooling. Sure enough, my reaction began to die down almost instantly.

After a good half-hour of calmness and almost forty-minutes of pesky subway delays, I arrived at the office around 10 a.m. So much for my early start to the day, but tis' life. At the office I made it my sole mission to stay cool and hydrated all day long. I drank approx 2.5 litres of water and steered clear of dried fruits, nuts, and anything else that may spark dehydration..or worse, another reaction! Thankfully, I was able to have a productive day, free of unwanted evil bumps.

I decided that this evening called for more coooooling effects.

[freshly washed basil]

For dinner, I turned to my trusty basil plant for a refreshing basil pesto and rice-pasta salad. Yum. It was just what the doctor ordered! I even mixed my leftovers with some organic baby spinach for my lunch tomorrow. 

Pesto Ingredients:

• 1 cup of fresh basil 
• 1/2 cup of raw pine nuts
• 1-2 tablespoon of olive oil
• pepper to taste

Pasta Ingredients:

• 1 cup of rice, whole-wheat or spelt pasta (I used rice!)
• 4-5 organic baby tomatoes, cut
• 6-10 spinach leaves
• pepper and or parsley for garnish 

[Refreshing basil pesto rice-pasta galore!]

Cook the pasta according to it's package directions. While the pasta is cooking, blend all your pesto ingredients together. Mix it all up and viola! You can either warm-up the pesto sauce with the spinach in a small pan or leave it raw. I left mine raw and lightly steamed the spinach. Heavenly. 

[up close and personal]

I then made a small serving of vegan banana soft serve for dessert. My favourite and incredibly cooling ;) As I sip my organic sweet dreams tea, it's safe to say that I feel much better compared to this morning...oh goodness, that was hell. If it happens again I'll have to see my naturopath for an emergency session. Fingers crossed I won't have to!

Goodnight bloggies and keep cool!

Fuel for a day

When I was in elementary school I had trouble sleeping unless a cute and coordinated outfit was neatly folded on my floor, for the next school day. I'd have all my clothes - socks, underwear, and all - and matching hair accessories aligned and ready to go. Type A much? Meh, I call it efficient.

Over a decade later, I still attempt to have a fresh steamed shirt or skirt ready for the next workday. Although I don't have my undies and hair accessories in line I do, however, sleep sound knowing that my tomorrow's-brain-fuel is well in tact.

Breakfast is by far my favourite meal of the day. I love my hot oatmeal creations, cold overnight vegan oats, energy packed cereal mixes, and spinach overload smoothies. Yum-o. The tricky thing about breakfast is that it doesn't quite get me through till lunch, which I usually eat around 12:30/1pm...but nor should it last me until then! I'm busy at the office with meetings, emails galore, phone chats, writing press releases, and planning various materials for clients...I need lots' a fuel!

It's no wonder why they say "breakfast is the most important meal of the day." Or is it just Moms who say that??

[10:45 a.m. snack...honeydew melon!]

I almost always kick-off my morning at the office with a hot cup of rooibos or green tea. I really like Organic Spicy Chocolate Rooibos or Spring Fling from DavidsTea (although, Spring Fling was a limited edition tea so they no longer have it :(..sorry). I also fill up a 1.5 litre jug of water! It's been SO humid here in Toronto so hydration is extra important. Does anyone else get bothered by the high humidity levels? -_- 

[4:00 p.m. snack...organic gala apple!]

I'll often bring some fruit or a Lara Bar (banana bread and peanut butter are my favs) for my a.m. snack and a small bag of raw trail-mix for my p.m. snack. I also pack a few apples for the week, just in case I feel like some crunch. I'm extra lucky because there is this amazing health foods store down the block from where I work. My colleague/good friend and I typically (okay, fine, everyday) walk down for a light post-lunch or p.m. snack. I like to get a few organic dried apple slices or unsulfured apricots. On a special day we'll both get some carob covered almonds. YUM. 

Do you have any favourite morning/afternoon snacks?

Tomorrow is gonna be a good snack day. I have slices of pineapple, for the morning, and carrots and hummus for the afternoon. I also have a GREAT salad packed for lunch...spinach, cucumber, radish (although, not sure I like radishes? :/ we'll see), raw pumpkin seeds, and quinoa!

It feels good to know I'm ready for the day ahead; at least, fuel wise.

Sweet dreams! 

Progress, not perfection

Progress, not perfection. Such a simple, yet empowering perspective to take. I must admit, it's a perspective that I should take more often. I was reminded of this simple phrase the other day when I stumbled upon Gena's post. 

Progress, not perfection. This statement resonates a lot with me right now. As I continue to experience an incredibly positive and holistic transformation I'm reminded that each and every step is a part of the journey. From my internal cleanse; green monster experiments; cooking for my parentals; and turning my boyfriend onto Amazing grass superfood..it's been quite the journey :) Although every step may not be perfect, it's indeed progress.

On Thursday night Alex and I went to see Inception, which was AMAZING by the way. Prior to the film I came armed with snacks - organic figs and carob covered almonds - so I wouldn't be tempted by Alex's big bag of popcorn. My organic snacks were all well and good until half way through the previews (yes, the movie hadn't even begun).. I sneakily reached across his lap for a small kernel or two. 

Well after a couple kernels I took a small handful to mix with my carob almonds, for good measure. A little voice inside of me was saying "noooo, what about your delicious figs?!" But then something marvellous happened. After one small handful, I didn't care to eat anymore. The popcorn was much saltier than I remembered. It left me feeling parched and dry; suddenly, I was extremely satisfied with both my carob almonds and plump dried figs.

Next time I go to the movies I doubt I'll even crave one kernel or two. I will already know that my healthier choices satisfy me just fine. Baby steps I guess. Maybe next time I'll get Alex to chomp down on figs and such with me? Now that would be progress ;)

Happy Civic long weekend! xo